Another One.....

Ooh, whilst raking through memories, I had to go for this one. This one's better than any of them so far. This one's a book. This one's a film. Hell, it's got its own sequel!

I met him on a car forum. Not the most auspicious of places, but amongst all the crap about exhausts and 'what does this button do?' there was a less salubrious place for the 'Sponsors' to chat away about everything and anything. And one rainy day, after I'd been a Sponsor for a while, I received a Private Message from this bloke. His girlfriend was also on the forum, but seemed quite a ballsy person so I'm assuming was used to her bloke ending PMs to girls with

'XXXX.'

I sure as hell wasn't, but he was cute - bleached blonde spiky hair, an abrupt, angry, funny manner and weird blue eyes that walked the thin line between madness and genius - or was it a stigmatism?

Within 3 hours of exchanging e-mails, he'd let me 'in so much further than anyone else before,' and we'd soon sped through the basic demographic exchange of information to his chequered, bloody and secretive military history. The next night we had a 5 hour MSN, the street-lights outside turning up their subtle blaze as night drew in on yours truly, furiously typing away into the lonely luminosity of the computer screen.

'I must go now, darling,' he typed at close to 3am. 'Think of me tightly, hold me close to you in your dreams.' I tottered back to my bedroom in a daze of something approaching love and lust. I awoke the next day to a text from him

'Good morning, my darling,' he said - nothing was to be short-handed, I later realised, nothing was to be cut out in his communication, other than the truth, naturellement - 'how are you?'

'Glowing,' I texted back simply - he said he was falling for my writing as much as anything, so I suckered it to him in one succinct word.

I got the 4 exes back and glowed a little more. Then I went downstairs and ate some Ready Brek and within a few minutes, was the only human being visible from the Moon....

You just know this one's got 'disaster' pinned all over it, don't you?